Essie

Essie’s new Naughty Nautical summer collection seems about as naughty to me as sipping a Shirley Temple while wearing flannel pajamas and watching a Murder She Wrote marathon.

In other words, not very naughty.

But that hasn’t stopped me from liking it. 🙂

I guess I just expected something…naughtier. Where I expected 50 Shades of Grey, these colors seem more like party shades to me, and no, I don’t mean naughty party. I’m thinking more along the lines of Pier 1 Imports and backyard barbecues in July.

Not that I’m complaining (at all), because I frickin’ love Pier 1! — and I’m digging this new limited edition six-piece summer collection, too.

It’s like the outdoor patio section at a Pier 1 exploded on a beauty shelf, and I mean that in the best possible way.

Every year around this time, Pier 1 stores go bat sh*t cray with color — corals, purples, greens, blues and teals — the same fiesta family of colors I’m seeing here.

Looking at these colors on my nails, I feel like I should be barefoot at a big barbecue with a margarita in my hand while I wait for my veggie hot dog to cook on the grill.

The six shades contain varying amounts of shimmer (from none to some), with two of them, the quieter pastels, balancing out the brighter colors.

Sunday Funday

Like a redder version of Chanel Lilis with silver shimmer, Sunday Funday almost looks like a cream from a few feet away, but then when I see it up close in full sunlight, BAM! — shimmer.

Naughty Nautical

After Essie weaned itself off of Ballet Slippers, they went off the hook with greens and teals (see: Where’s My Chauffer).

Naughty Nautical is another shade in that vein — like floating around in warm emerald waters — and I think it gets the shimmer just right.

You know, I was just thinkin’…

Things could be a whole lot worse right now. I’ve got a roof over my head, a tabby in my life, gloss in my purse, and if I had to — in the event that Z-Day or an alien invasion occurs — I could probably hobble at least 10 miles to safety.

Truth be told, I can’t complain.

That’s not to say that I want a vacation. I do. I’d love one.

Heck, I’d love to spend a week hanging out by the pool at a five-star resort. Maaaan, that sounds good!

I’d want to bring Tabs and El Hub along, of course. 🙂 And definitely the four Essie Resort 2013 polishes, too.

I can see it now… Me, you, two of those inflatable mattresses in an infinity pool, and the Resort collection’s four creamy polishes on our tips and toes.

I think that’s exactly what Essie had in mind when they gave Mint green First Timer, aqua In the Cab-ana, purple orchid Under Where and reddish coral Come Here an intense, mirror-like shine.

Summer, summer, summertime!