Tabs

The time goes by so fast… That’s such a cliché , but it’s a cliché because it’s true. It really does seem like yesterday Tabs was this bouncy kitten with bright green eyes and a crooked tail who would pounce in and out of my apartment. Now he’s like the crabby old man who begrudgingly lets me hug him him and hold him and pet him.

He’s still all sweetness at heart, though, and being his pet mom has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. He’s been my constant companion, dance partner and sounding board for 10 years.

Thinking back, the first time I really felt bonded to him was the first time we took him to the vet. He was still more or less a neighborhood stray at the time, and we think he was about a year old. He would come around our old apartment building, but he always left on his nightly adventures at night.

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A study in whiskers

As a fellow feline aficionado, I’m sure you’ll appreciate this. Tabs takes great pride in his whiskers and his whisker maintenance regimen.

Every night after dinner he oils his whiskers and smooths down any flyaways. It’s one of the things he always, always does.

He may skip his personal grooming session/giving himself a cat bath sometimes after a really long, tough kitty modeling day, but he never neglects whisker maintenance.

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Tabs was hongry today on our walk. Not just hungry, but hongry. He was ravenous! He didn’t even care about the giant turkeys gobbling on the hill or the little kids shouting at the neighborhood playground. He was too busy hunting for the freshest, tastiest shoots of grass, which were hard to find today because the condo landscapers mowed the hill this week.

Tabby loves Novato so much, and we’re coming up on the best time of year for kitty exploring. The days are nice and long now, which means that he can go for more walks.

The only problem is that everyone else has the same idea, so there are also more trespassers and violators of the Tabs the Cat Industries LLC property perimeter.

Consequently, sometimes Tabs has to flex his kitty muscles to show ’em who’s boss, and he’s always ready to throw down, because you never know when some other cat will attempt a hostile takeover. As I’m sure you know, the kitty modeling business is cutthroat.

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Folks ’round these parts see some strange things… They talk of a magical creature known as the tabby-corn that lives near the edge of the forest.

It chases butterflies ? all day long, and some say it makes the flowers ? bloom.

Sometimes it gets up right close to a person, close enough that you can hear its magical purr, and if’n it’s feelin’ benevolent, because sometimes the tabby-corn can be a mischievous ragamuffin, it’ll conjure two fresh cod on a log and give ’em to you as a gift, especially if you give the tabby-corn chin scritches first.

If you’re ever out near the edge of the forest and you hear a purring sound, call out, “Here, tabby, tabby-corn! Here, tabby, tabby-corn!” And maybe — just maybe! — he’ll come out and play with you. 🙂

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Tabs had no idea he was being watched/stalked this morning on his walk. As he was surveying his domain and taste-testing the foliage, the neighbor’s Shih Tzu was watching the watcher. Tabs had no idea that he was the one who was actually under surveillance.

It was kind of embarrassing.

Lots of interesting things in the circle this morning, notwithstanding the dog that caught Tabs totally unawares.

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My darlings and divas,

Greetings and love to you all! I’m feeling exceptionally well rested and relaxed today, which is unusual considering my recent trip to Japan. I expected to still be jet-lagged.

I was there on a whirlwind week of work because my agent booked me on a speaking tour across Japan’s famed cat islands, so I shared my years of business experience with the local cats there, discussing personal branding, managing Internet fame, and forecasting upcoming fashion trends for summer/fall/winter 2017.

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Mmm, Tabs did not wanna go back in the house after his walk today. No, sir, he was feelin’ the outdoors, because this is that sweet spot time between the rains we had and when the neighborhood landscapers mow the grass on the hill. Plus, it’s been sunny for a week, so the grass is growing, and it’s primo time for tabby skulking.

He totally gets into it, too, like he’s hunting a gazelle, but it’s really a lizard or a grasshopper or something else.

And he ate so. Much. Grass. I’m still expecting him to barf, which is usually what he does when he eats that much salad.

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Tabs is very unhappy with Ryan Gosling this year. A lot of people don’t know this, but Tabs was supposed to play the lead in La La Land, but they gave the role to Ryan. Tabs is pretty sure it was because Ryan showed an aptitude for piano and, lacking opposable thumbs, Tabs didn’t.

So tonight’s the big night! Oscar night.

While Tabs didn’t have the lead, he did still have a part in La La Land. He played Dancing Cat#3 in one of the big routines…

Tabs always looks forward to Oscar night. As you know, he has 17 Academy Awards (more than any other cat actor), but he’s only up for one award this year. He was nominated for Best Cat Actor for his emotional portrayal of a kitten who falls asleep on a milk truck and wakes to find himself in a totally different neighborhood.

There’s some confusion out there because it’s also called Lion and stars many of the same people as the other Lion starring Dev Patel, which is also up for an Academy Award.

Anyway, the one with Tabs is the one we’re rooting for. 🙂

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addicts,

Karen and Tabs