Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 345

Dear Diary,

Wow, it’s been a while! I’ve missed you so much, diary. Things have been craaay on this end. I’ve still been writing — don’t you worry about that — but admittedly not enough here.

I’ll explain in a bit, but first… Gosh, where do I start?

Well, I guess I’ll start at the beginning of my day! My new trainer had me doing wind sprints up and down the stairs as part of my daily workout.

It’s all about getting fit for summer, and I’ve been working out like a fiend, diary. I mean, it’s already May! Can you believe that? And that means that bikini season is right around the corner, and that means that I have to get freaking fit NOW. As you know, I have a reputation to uphold in the cat modeling world, and I’m already fully booked through summer.

Plus, I have this beefcake calendar coming out… Don’t judge.

Getting bikini ready

Thank goodness for my trainer! He’s actually the guy who created Golden State Warriors star Stephen Curry’s agility training program, and he’s got me on an intense regimen of kitty squats, crinkly ball chasing, air pawing and circuit training, where I run circles around the office and then leap from the floor up to the top of my cat tower to tone my haunches.

I really feel it in my back paws…

It’s great stuff, but exercise is definitely not one of my favorite things to do, so I’ve started bribing myself with accessories to stay motivated, and it really works! I got the idea from my assistant who does it all the time. All I do is tell myself that I can get one of those new lightweight linen cat collars from Burberry (I can’t wait to post about it on my new website, but wait! — I’m getting ahead of myself) if I exercise every day this week.

Summer season accessories

It’s a form of meow-based mental trickery.

I’m also… Well, my ninth birthday is coming up, and I’ve been thinking a lot about… I don’t know, I guess, my legacy? I’m getting older, and I’m not a kitten anymore.

Along those lines, earlier this year I started my scholarship for young kitty models who want to make a change in their life, and I’m also trying to give back to the kitty modeling community by writing my memoirs.

A tabby turns 9…

I’m turning nine, diary! I know. Where does the time go? It feels like I was just a little kitten running around the streets of Mill Valley, all rough around the edges, and now I’m this huge international kitty modeling superstar who’s also turning nine.

I find myself asking, “What’s next?” What’s next for Tabs? There will, of course, be more modeling, but there are so many other things I’d also like to accomplish, which brings me to this…

I’m going on a speaking tour! Yup, this summer. I’ll be speaking about the cat modeling biz at select Petco stores and a number of corporate campuses.

(This is on the hush-hush, but one of them is in Cupertino at Apple.)

This will be my first speaking tour, so I’m a little nervous, but I just hope that I’ll be able to inspire cats and help them achieve their dreams through hard work and purr-severance. And perhaps a sexy tum.

To prepare for the tour, my agent has me doing vocal exercises throughout the day, but my assistants just don’t get it. They think I’m complaining, but I’m not. I’m purposefully being awesome, because everything I do has a purpose, including this.

To promote the speaking tour, my agent has also encouraged me to start posting again on my website, Party With Tabs.

Chatty tabby

It’s weird…but I have this reputation as an international playboy tabby, but I’m really just a normal, everyday cat who also happens to have accomplished tremendous things.

Anyway, diary, thank you for listening. You’ve always been there for me, and I really should update you more often.

I’m off now! I think I’ll take a nap.

Love,
Tabs