

Dear Karl Lagerfeld,
Look, I get it. I do. I totally understand why you feel so strongly about sweatpants. I feel the same way about wearing pajamas in public.
When I grew up, pajamas were strictly for use at home, and I still hold on to that belief. No one should have to see a grown man wearing red plaid pajamas on a Tuesday afternoon at the mall. I mean, really? You couldn’t spare 10 seconds to put on jeans? Please…
Sweatpants, however, I don’t know… I really love some of mine, and they’re not all bad, Karl. I have a killer pair by Zella that does great things for my bum. Makes me look like I spend all day doing squats with J. Lo and cutting carbs.
Plus, I wouldn’t know what else I’d wear with my L’Oreal Colour Riche Glossy Balms.

Come on, Karl, don’t act like you’re too good for the drugstore. *Snaps in a Z formation.* I’m telling you, I really think you’d like these balms. They have as much pigment as any of the other lippies in my makeup bag and an elegant, soft shine worthy of the House of Chanel.

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Based on the cuteness factor of the packaging, at the very least, I expected 





























Tonight I find myself pondering imponderable things… 
