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I’ve come to the realization that “adult” coloring books are a total scam.

They’re supposed to be for stress relief, and I love the amazing intricate artwork. I have a couple of them, but after YEARS I’ve yet to finish a single picture. Not one.

Mostly, it’s because I can never decide what colors to use in the tiny shapes. Like, if I commit to coloring one small triangle in the spokes of this bike wheel with a dark forest green, it basically sets the tone for the rest of the picture. I’m obsessed with committed to coloring all of the similar triangles the exact same shade of green, and then all of shapes around the triangles need to be complementary tones… It isn’t particularly relaxing for a person who tends to overly complicate most things (*cough* me).

Children’s coloring books, though, are a totally different story! I love ’em. Children’s coloring books are where it’s at, girlfriend.

I color a lot with Connor in her books, which are more my speed than the adult ones. The shapes are easier to color-coordinate and don’t take a lot of brain power. Plus, when your toddler art director has very strong feelings about unicorns having rainbow manes, you have to listen.

Onward to this week’s stories…

• If I were a rare book collector (and had cash to burn), I’d put in a bid for this copy of the first Western book on makeup and perfume. It dates back to 1555! If you’re interested, it goes up for auction next week in Paris.
• Fave read of the week: What does it mean when a beauty product is labeled clean, green or natural? Apparently, not much. As more companies label themselves and their products as “clean,” or made without harsh chemicals and therefore better for you than unclean (?) products, there’s still no official oversight dictating what these statements mean, and it’s causing upheaval in the beauty business.
• I feel like you need to blast I Got 5 On It when you’re using the new Hello, Calm mask from Origins, since the key ingredient is a non-intoxicating cannabis sativa oil derived from hemp seeds.
• Look what the cat dragged in!

• Cult fragrance brand Byredo has a new freestanding store in London, and it’s g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s.

  (They also sell bags there.)

• Because I know you were dying of curiosity, here’s what’s involved when Nick Jonas gets ready for photoshoots or the red carpet. According to men’s groomer Marissa Machado, his process involves bronzing, chest hair cleanup and the occasional abdominal contour.
• Wet ‘n’ Wild has a new “zombie” blush that goes from black in the pan to pink on the skin, WHA?! Color me confused, because if I were a zombie, I’d actually want a black blush to go with my gray skin tone… But hey, that’s just me.
• Videos of cats hiking. (It’s a thing.)
• Talk about the best gift ever! — now you can buy the original old-school Sweet Valley High books from the ’80s.

This dad talkin’ about his 23-year old daughter’s brows cracks me up!

Anyone wanna go grocery shopping with me to this store?

Special girl, real good girl

Am I really gonna watch this 20-minute video of this cat swimming? Yes, yes, I am. 🙂

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,

Karen

So, my skinny jeans are currently on my mind, and as simultaneously confusing as it sounds, they’re on my to-buy list AND my Kon Mari list (I gotta buy a couple new pairs, and I also have to donate all of the too-tight ones that give me grief to Goodwill).

See, I haven’t worn any other style of jeans for the last few years. Even when I was pregnant with Connor, I still wore maternity skinnies.

While some people view skinny jeans as restrictive, to me there’s something comforting about wearing close-fitting denim with a touch of stretch. Whenever I slip into mine, a vacuuming suction sound happens — ZOOOOOOP!

But if I’ve learned anything during my skinny jeans adventure over the years, it’s that all skinny jeans are not created alike. It’s REALLY hard to find the perfect ratio of stretch to denim. Plus, there are all sorts of other things to consider, like the type of wash, the pocket placement, waist style (high-waisted all the way, the way baby!), where the hems hit, and most importantly (IMHO), distressing…

OH EM GEE. You know those jeans that are purposefully light and distressed in the butt? Yeah, I don’t need a spotlight saying, “HAAAAY, CHECK OUT THIS BOO-TAY.” No thank you! But, if the jeans are perfect in every other way (rise, hem, price, etc.), I’ll consider them anyway… It’s a very complicated formula!

Anyway, I’ve been getting by on two pairs of Universal Thread jeans from Target for the last couple months, and they’ve worked out alright, but I’m still kinda frustrated because I have to keep pulling them up after they stretch out. Plus, the lighter pair is already starting to get holes.

So now I’m thinking of splurging on the high-waisted pair from LOFT pictured at the top.

Cute, right? They’re selling out fast though. Wish I’d gotten them on sale a few weeks ago, le sigh!

Skinny jeans: Do you love them or loathe theme? Details please.

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,

Karen

Typical of what I wear on any given day. KIDDING! (This was the dress I wore to the Emmys a few years ago.)

Fall means fall color, which brings me to this question I ask every once in a while: To what extent do you coordinate your makeup to match your outfits? Like, do you ever plan what makeup you’re going to wear with an outfit the night before? Or, do you typically make your apparel choices on the fly, with a blatant disregard for lipstick and/or eyeshadow color?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Historically, I’ve been more of a “Let’s see how I’m feeling today” kinda girl, both with clothes and makeup. I’ve probably only coordinated my makeup/clothes a handful of times in all my years of face painting; however, I like the idea in theory. I like the idea of planning everything the day before, especially the day before something important.

Methinks I’ll give it a try sometime soon.

How about you? Do you coordinate your makeup to match your clothes? And if you do, how far do you go with it?

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,

Karen

P.S. Happy humpday. ?

Do you ever use stuff you only feel so-so about?

Me: Oh, gosh, yes. I do it all the time…and that answer feels somehow wrong because there’s so much good stuff out there, right? Why wear anything that doesn’t completely blow your mind when most places have a good return policy?

To that I say, “I dunno…” It usually happens because I bought something on a whim while doing non-beauty shopping at Trader Joe’s or Target or someplace else and subsequently lost the receipt, so later I figure that I might as well keep using the thing to get my money’s worth.

Other times, it happens because I like something enough to keep using it…even though I was never totally blown away by it. I just keep using it like a robot until the next big thing comes along (because there’s always another next big thing).

How about you?

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,

Karen

So…what is the Monday Poll?

Good question! It isn’t, contrary to its name, an actual poll. It’s just a list of five more or less random questions I’ve been posting on this blog every Monday morning for the past gazillion years (more than 10!). I love reading your answers, and it helps me get my week off to a great start. ?

1. What’s your current pedicure situation?

It’s pretty dire and has been for a month. Unpainted toenails and scraggly cuticles FOR DAYS, man.

But on the glass-half-full side, I’ve been good about shaving my toe hairs and moisturizing, ha ha ha! ?

I need to visit the nail salon ASAP because while I could easily do my own pedi, I never feel like I have a long enough block of time at home to sit still and actually DO THEM, ya know?

2. Has an animal ever pooped on you?

Oh, for sure, many times. I’ve been pooped on by birds. Twice. Once was in middle school while I was walking to English class, and again in high school while we were eating lunch outside one day. (Side note: To make band sound even more geeky than it actually is/was, most of the band nerds in my high school ate lunch at the tables right next to the band room. It’s like we couldn’t be away from our instruments for too long or we’d melt.)

And in my adult life, both of the little animals I currently serve have “number two-ed” on me multiple times.

3. Resting BF, side eye, or eye roll?

Eye roll, ya’ll! It’s what I do best. ?

4. Gym, tanning, or laundry?

Hmm… Seeing as how I’m currently doing a load of laundry as I’m typing this (WHEN AM I NOT DOING LAUNDRY THOUGH?!), and I’m already tan, I’m going to pick gym…but only if you pronounce it like “YIM.” ?

5. Fish tail or french braid?

Neither. Dutch braid all the way.

BONUS QUESTION: Have you ever taken candy from a stranger?

Ya know…I almost reflexively said no to this, but then I thought about it. There have been countless times when I’ve sat next to people on planes or in lectures at school and they offered me a stick of gum or a Tic Tac, and I accepted. Also, technically, those ladies who work behind the counter at See’s Candies are strangers, and I gleefully take candy from them.

Also, Halloweens. I don’t know all of the people in all of the houses we’ve gone to.

So, my answer is yes.

Sorry, Mom! Apparently, all of those warnings were for naught.

Pumpkin madness has begun

OK, now that we’ve officially made it to mid-September, I feel like I can succumb to the pumpkin madness surrounding me.

I even have a plan!

Don’t laugh. (OK, you can totally laugh.) I’m going to decorate our living room with festive pumpkins because I believe that if you ever have an opportunity to decorate your home with plants from the Cucurbitaceae family, you have to take it.

And I want ALL THE PUMPKINS!

Well…except for this one.

What say you — cute or creepy? Looking at it makes my skin tingle (and not in a good way), and I feel like slathering myself with Lubriderm.

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,

Karen

P.S. Question time! Here are they are to copy/paste with your answers in a comment. Talk to you soon.

1. What’s your current pedicure situation?
2. Has an animal ever pooped on you?
3. Resting BF, side eye, or eye roll?
4. Gym, tanning, or laundry?
5. Fish tail or French braid?

BONUS QUESTION: Have you ever taken candy from a stranger?