Tabs keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Big Spoon and Little Spoon
tabs
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 217
Crushed… Tabs was crushed when he found out that Brad Pitt beat him out for Chanel’s big new ad campaign for Chanel No. 5.
It just didn’t make any sense. Tabs had already done a very successful run of No. 5 print ads earlier this year for magazines (like the ad up top), so when he got the call from his agent last month that the Chanel people decided to “go a different route” this time, Tabs couldn’t believe his ears.
“Mrow!?” he barked on the phone to his agent (“Who got the job?”).
“Brad Pitt,” his agent replied.
Well, Tabs felt a little better when he heard that. After all, Brad Pitt is also a pretty big star.
In this business, you win some, you lose some. C’est la vie. 🙂
Even though Tabs lost the new Chanel campaign, he’s still been very busy. This week he had kitty modeling jobs for a bunch of big brands, including MAC, Tom Ford Beauty, Estée Lauder and Korres. If you’re interested, here are the pics (Tabs is very proud of these)…
Oh, and don’t forget to enter this weekend’s giveaway for a $50 eGift card from Sephora. You still have a few hours (closes at 11:59 p.m. PST), but you better act fast. Good luck!
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 216
From the very beginning here at Tabs the Cat Industries, LLC, Tabs has kept the company culture very much in line with other Bay Area startups — on-site gym, child and kitten care, 24/7 catering and a lax dress code (hoodies, flip-flops and ironic t-shirts strongly encouraged).
But I sense a change coming. With the company’s rapid expansion into the burgeoning global gravy market, the rumors have started, and some of the employees suspect that things around here are about to get a lot more corporate.
Of course, rumor mills will churn! The other day by the water cooler, I overheard Tabs say that he was planning on ditching the casual dress code. Yeah, he wants the place to have a more fashion-forward, 
kitty-centric look, and I’m not sure how I feel about that…
I do want to be a team player, though, and since the writing’s on the wall, I better start building my new wardrobe now. To that end, I spent some time this weekend shopping online for more appropriate cat-centered accessories and clothes.
And since I know that some of you are also full-time pet assistants, I thought I’d share some of the cool cat things I found. I mean, you never know when your kitty dictator/employer will put a new dress code in place. Cats do talk amongst themselves, after all, and it can’t hurt to be prepared. 🙂
So, here are…
21 Cat-Themed Clothes and Accessories for the Corporate Cat Office
1. The Cute Cat T-Shirt
$30, available now at the PrettySnake Etsy shop.
2. Cats Are My Boyfriend Sweatshirt
$29, available now at the DentzDesign Etsy shop.
3. Red/Orange Undies With Two Cute Cats
$14, available now at the NinaValkhoff Etsy shop.
4. The Constant Companion Ring in Persian Cat
$74.99, available now at ModCloth.
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 215
Just as most viewers, myself included, were beginning to feel like the show had already jumped the cat/shark, Project Catwalk totally redeemed itself with a tour de force Season 3 premiere.
OMG! Did you watch last night?? So much drama! So much cat politicking! So much fierce tail flicking and cat attitude. One thing should be clear by now — this season, the contestants showed up to werk!
In Season 1, it was obvious to most feline and human viewers that Snowball was the cat to beat. She dominated from the very first challenge, winning six of the nine catwalk competitions. Honestly, was anyone really surprised when judge Tabs called her “the best damn plus-size kitty cat-walker since, well, me”? I mean, it was pretty obvious.
In Season 2, however, the maturity level just wasn’t there. All 10 kitten contestants were simply too young and hyper to compete, and none of them could concentrate for more than a few seconds.
But this season, at least four of the contestant cats appear to have what it takes to go all the way to Feline Fashion Week. The Russian Blue, the twin Siamese kitties and the Ragdoll all have professional-caliber catwalk confidence and poise.
At this point, it’s really anyone’s competition…
So the question remains, who will win this season of Project Catwalk? I for one can’t wait to find out. 🙂
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 214
Okay, so the writers of The Walking Dead are totally earning their keep so far this season. Fo’ reals! The show is in the midst of a third-season renaissance!
Sure, you have to like zombies and whatnot, but luckily, I do. 🙂
I got so fired up watching tonight’s episode that as soon as it was over I clicked over to amazon.com and started filling my cart with emergency supplies! — you know, just in case.
- Aquamira Water Treatment Drops 1oz – $10.83
- Fancy Feast Gourmet Cat Food, Grilled Seafood Variety Pack, 3-Ounce Cans (Pack of 24) – $13.68
- Mainstay Emergency Food Rations – 3600 Calorie Bars (Single) – $8.49
- Mountain House Freeze Dried Meals (Pack of 10) – $39.99
- Charmin Ultra Soft Toilet Tissue (40 Rolls) – $31.50
- Emergency Mylar Thermal Blankets (Pack of 10) – $8.57
- Ambient Weather WR-111A Emergency Solar Hand Crank AM/FM/NOAA Digital Radio, Flashlight, Cell Phone Charger – $41.87
- Emergency Fire Starter – $3.25
- Cyalume SnapLight Industrial Grade Chemical Light Sticks, Yellow, 6″ Long, 12 Hour Duration (Pack of 10) – $10.19
- 100 Feet of Rothco 550lb. Type III Nylon Paracord (in Pink) – $8.43
- SAS Survival Handbook, Revised Edition: For Any Climate, in Any Situation – $12.18
- UAG Limited Signature Series Tactical 10.5″ Black Stainless Steel Military Combat Grade Battle Axe Tomahawk Hunter Camping Survival Tool With Nylon Belt Sheath – $17.99
- Leatherman 830039 New Wave Multitool with Leather/Nylon Combination Sheath – $60.89
- First Aid Only Outdoor First Aid Kit, Soft Case, 205-Piece Kit – $21.75
LOL! But seriously, I should probably have some of these things around the house…and not just for zombies, but for any kind of emergency.
Do you have an emergency kit at home? If you do, what’s in it? Obviously, Tabs has one just for his personal supplies — kitty litter, cases of gravy and bags of dry food, spare feather toys, that kind of thing — but I feel like we should have one for the humans, too. 🙂
In other news, Tabs had a pretty busy week of kitty modeling. Lots going on in the world of feline fabulosity, and here are some of his latest pics…
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 213
Ooh! I watched the season premiere of The Walking Dead tonight with Tabs, and it was…interesting.
Tabs and I shared a big tub of microwave popcorn, and I took notes during the show while he barked out orders like, “Mrrow.” [Look into getting us a dirt bike for quick escapes, and get straps to attach a cat carrier.]
Tabs actually loves zombie movies, shows and literature. He’s read more than 100 zombie books, something he refers to as “research,” and he takes his zombie apocalypse preparations very seriously. For instance, he has stockpiles of gravy that even I don’t know about, and he’s drafted elaborate emergency plans.
In the event of a zombie outbreak, I am to report to the Emergency Operations Center (EOC) at Makeup and Beauty Blog headquarters, where I will be responsible for opening the cans of gravy, thanks to my time-tested opposable thumbs.
Tabs says that in the zombie books he’s read, cats rarely play a major role, but he attributes this to feline self-sufficiency. See, cats don’t stick around when the sh*t hits the fan. No way. They turn tail and run!
Still, he hopes the day never comes, though, because it would result in a serious drop in worldwide gravy production. 🙂
In other news, this was a pretty busy week for Tabs, irrespective of zombies. He had kitty modeling jobs for a number of big beauty brands. I don’t know if you’re into that kind of thing (kitty supermodeling), but if you are, here are the highlights from this week’s campaigns…
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 212
Dear Tabby is written by Tabs the Cat, commonly regarded as “the world’s first plus-size kitty supermodel.” Founded in mid 2012, it has quickly become the most widely syndicated cat advice column on earth — known for its fresh, feline perspective on lifestyle, fashion and style issues affecting cats and humans.
Home wrecker or house cat?
DEAR TABBY: My assistant has been spending a lot of time with the cat next door…
I don’t know if I should be concerned, but I do tend to worry. A lot. About everything. See, I’m a scaredy cat, and being nervous is in my nature.
Her name is Patches — the cat, not my assistant — and we’re actually all close friends. I’ve always assumed that Patches lives in one of the houses in our neighborhood, but I’ve never met her assistant. In fact, I don’t even know if she has one. Patches spends most of her time hiking and exploring the great outdoors.
Sometimes when my assistant — let’s call her Jane — and I go out for a walk, we run into Patches, and everything seems fine. I feel like we’re all friends, but then Jane spends a good 10 minutes petting Patches and scratching behind her ears.
Right in front of me!
This last time, Jane even gave Patches some treats from her pocket! The same treats Jane always gives to me!
I just don’t know what to do. Jane and I have been together for more than six years, and she’s so much more than an employee to me. We’re also best friends.
What do you think, Tabby? I know that you and your assistant (Karen, right?) have also been together for a long time. Should I be concerned, or am I just being a scaredy cat?
— Not Loving My Neighbor
DEAR NOT LOVING: I feel your pain. The bond between a feline and his/her pet assistant is sacred, and while I think you should be a little concerned, it’s probably too early to bare your claws.
Yes, your assistant’s actions are highly suspicious, but there may be other things going on. Jane may not be doing anything wrong. Sometimes cats like Patches who spend a lot of time on their own get very lonely. Maybe she’s just looking for a little love and attention. I’ve known many outdoor kitties like that.
Until you have all the facts, it’s too early to assume that your assistant is looking for a new job. Keep your eyes and ears open, and if Patches comes home with your assistant one of these days, that’s your cue to overreact.
Three problems with boundaries
DEAR TABBY: I pet assist for three very lovely Siamese kitties, and I love my job. I love working for all three of them, but they have no respect for boundaries. I can’t even take a lunch break without one or more of them strolling into my office unannounced.
I’m not sure what to do…
I could be sitting there at my desk eating a sandwich — so obviously I’m taking a break — but they act totally unaware. They hop up on the desk, walk all over my sandwich and even have the nerve to purr.
Tabby, I take my job very seriously, but by the same token, I also need my breaks. Am I being unreasonable to expect a little courtesy? Isn’t their behavior rude?
— Working Hard for the Money
DEAR WORKING HARD: You must be an amazing pet assistant because it sounds like your three kitty employers really, really love spending time with you.
My personal philosophy? Humans deserve breaks and boundaries, too. But not all felines feel the same way.
I think you need to have a conversation with your employers. Be firm with them, but don’t yell. If you yell, they’ll just run away. Tell them that you love assisting them but need a break during the day. An hour of alone time at lunch shouldn’t be too much to ask.
[Continue reading…]
Sundays With Tabs the Cat, Makeup and Beauty Blog Mascot, Vol. 211
I’m sitting here in the living room eating popcorn and watching the fifth season of Friday Night Lights, and Tabs is nowhere to be found. I think he turned in early, totally tuckered out after the rollicking weekend he had.
He didn’t party in the traditional sense, but he did host a couple of parties — or rather I did, seeing as how I take care of that kind of thing for him as his professional pet assistant/lackey.
Let me just say this: if I never see another catnip cocktail in my entire life, it’ll be too soon.
I’m sure he’ll be down for dinner… Tabs hasn’t missed a dinner in, um, ever. He better hurry, though, because I don’t know how much longer I’ll be awake.
I may try to coax him downstairs with cookie dough… Seriously, it’s the weirdest thing. Whenever I bake cookies and bust out one of those tubes of Toll House cookie dough, Tabs comes runnin’. I don’t know if it’s the crinkling of the packaging or the scent of the dough, but he stands up on his hind legs at the kitchen counters, meows and flashes his sad eyes like he’s saying, “Please, miss, can you spare a cookie? I’m so very hungry.”
Yeah, right! We all know that’s B.S., as evidenced by his No. 1 ranking from the Association of Plus Size Kitty Supermodels, and it doesn’t look like he’s going to lose that ranking anytime soon, not with busy modeling weeks like this one. Here are some of the campaigns he did… 🙂
